me and mommies
In the course of writing the book proposal for my upcoming memoir- “Moms and Bombs”, I have had a chance to reflect on my life in a more “big picture” way than the day-to-day navel gazing I do generally affords. I’d say the major conclusion I’ve reached is that not only did I have gay parents, I had great gay parents. I am so thankful that I have been raised by such extraordinary women. I made it out to RainbowVision, the gay retirement community out here in Santa Fe, at long last. I had tried to entice them towards me with promises of a Tennesee Williams playreading series but was, surprisingly I thought, ignored. I had to be invited over informally instead, alas. But there I was, in the apartment of an older lesbian named Judith, being lectured about my memoir, though she hadn’t heard it fully explained. I’d just given her the tag line ” Can the daughter of a quartet of lesbians find love with an Israeli combat soldier?” ” I hope you aren’t going to write some post-feminist piece of crap”, she said in response. I assured her that I was wallowing in Feminism, happily entrenched. ” Because I don’t need some book that doesn’t acknowledge the struggle that made your life possible. I mean you are standing on the shoulders of some strong women…and I don’t think you can leave out the politics that made your life happen…” As her words pour over me, I feel both very at home, and confused, as to how thousand of miles away from home and mothers, i’ve been able to manifest something so familiar. How many countless women have felt the need to endow me with what they consider important. I have been made a vessel for their wisdom. I am a community investment and while occasionally it feels like a lot of old ladies telling me what to do, in my more mature moments, I am grateful that they care about me, that they are walking with me on my path, guiding my steps. Even women I’ve just met. ” I am definitely planning to honor the women who raised me,” I promise her. ” I don’t think theres any way I could describe my life, accurately, without including the political aspect of my being. You know, if the personal is political, doubly so for me, right?” I am happy to see that she has all the same books on her shelves as my Moms- “Nice Jewish Girls: a lesbian anthology” makes me feel especially at home. I am thankful that, in this day and age, I have a community no matter where I go- another gift from my mothers. Thanks Moms!!!!